Five Favorite Films

Five Favorite Films with Ted

The furry star of 2012's biggest comedy waxes lyrical on the cinema he pleasures himself with.

by | December 10, 2012 | Comments

He’s the star (well, co-star if you count Mark Wahlberg) of 2012’s highest-grossing comedy (unless you count Breaking Dawn — Part 2), so we felt it only fitting to ask Ted, the titular furball from Seth MacFarlane’s R-rated hit, to give us his all-time five favorite films.

“Besides Flash Gordon,” he says, “which you already know is my number one favorite film of all time.”

Indeed, anyone who’s seen the movie will remember Ted and John’s shared affection for the camp sci-fi classic, and the bear also gave us another insight into his creative process: “Yes, the hotel room fight scene was inspired in part by Road House,” he reveals. So now you know that.

Here now are the rest of Ted’s most treasured works of cinema, many of which, curiously, correspond with Sight & Sound‘s list of the all-time greatest films. Possibly.

You can catch the diminutive beast’s acting debut in Ted, which is out on Blu-ray and DVD this week.

Flash Gordon (Mike Hodges, 1980; 80% Tomatometer)



The best movie ever made. EVER. It has action, adventure, Sam Jones, epic space battles, hot space babes and a kickass theme song. And one day, I will realize my dream of sleeping with Princess Aura of Mongo, even if I have to pay an escort to wear the outfit.

Road House (Rowdy Herrington, 1989; 43% Tomatometer)



There is only one Patrick Swayze, and this is the ultimate Swayze flick. As a Mercedes-driving bouncer with a degree in philosophy, he is perhaps the second-greatest action hero of all time. It’s almost as if Walker, Texas Ranger and Billy Jack had a smarter, better-looking brother who also knew how to dance. I can watch this movie forever.

Tango & Cash (Albert Magnoli and Andrey Konchalovskiy , 1989; 39% Tomatometer)



This is like Road House in stereo. You get a badass Stallone and a badass Kurt Russell as buddy cops who get framed and sent to prison. John and I used to pretend we were Tango and Cash when we were kids. In fact, we still do whenever we watch it, which was as recently as last week. It just never gets old.

Up in Smoke (Lou Adler and Tommy Chong, 1978; 38% Tomatometer)



Cheech and Chong were these stoned guys from the 1970s who got famous getting high and then made movies about getting high, which made them more famous. This is their first movie, and also their best. It is, quite possibly, the Citizen Kane of pot movies.

Dude, Where’s My Car? (Danny Leiner, 2000; 18% Tomatometer)



I cannot praise this film enough. It has given me (and John) the gift of laughter even when sober, which is the sign of a truly great movie. It has everything: hot babes, aliens, a refrigerator full of pudding — I really think everything came together in this one, and it shows. If a non-porn film can make you feel as good as this one does, then it truly is movie magic.


Ted is out on DVD and Blu-ray this week.