The "People's Choice" is Pure Idiocy

by | January 11, 2006 | Comments

Whenever I share a new Top Ten List or Critic’s Group Nomination list, I’m always extra careful to be fair and respectful of other peoples’ opinions. But after seeing what the "People’s Choice Awards" handed out for 2005’s movies, I just can’t contain myself. It’s simply too hilarious.

According to CNN, "the nominations were determined by editors at Entertainment Weekly, the People’s Choice production team and a panel of pop culture fans. Winners were determined by Internet voting."

So here are the peoples’ choices:

Favorite Female Movie Star: Sandra Bullock
Also nominated: Angelina Jolie & Nicole Kidman

(Ms. Bullock appeared in two films in 2005: the ensemble drama "Crash" and the stunningly awful "Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous.")

Favorite Male Movie Star: Johnny Depp
Also nominated: Nicolas Cage & Samuel L. Jackson

(OK, no real complaint here, even if applauding the awesomeness of Johnny Depp has grown a little old-hat by now. JD did have a great ’05 tho, starring in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," "Corpse Bride," and "The Libertine.")

Favorite Leading Lady: Reese Witherspoon
Also nominated: Cameron Diaz & Renee Zellweger

(So does this mean Reese isn’t a "movie star"?)

Favorite Leading Man: Brad Pitt
Also nominated: Jamie Foxx & Adam Sandler

(Just for "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" alone? OK, peoples. Better than the alternatives, anyway.)

Favorite Female Action Star: Jennifer Garner
Also nominated: Angelina Jolie & Catherine Zeta-Jones

(Well this just makes no freakin’ sense at all. The only action movie Ms. Garner appeared in last year was "Elektra," which nobody went to see because it sucked. And yet enough people saw it to make it their "choice.")

Favorite Male Action Star: Matthew McConaughey
Also nominated: Brad Pitt & The Rock

(For "Sahara"? Did nobody SEE the lead actor in "Batman Begins"?)

Favorite On-Screen Matchup: Vince Vaughn & Owen Wilson in "Wedding Crashers"
Also nominated: Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt in "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" and Chris Rock & Adam Sandler in "The Longest Yard"

(I’m really glad they said "On-Screen," otherwise I’d assume Vince and Owen are lovers.)

Favorite Movie Comedy: "Wedding Crashers"
Also nominated: "Hitch" & "The Longest Yard"

(Raise your hand if you honestly think "Wedding Crashers" is funnier than "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," which somehow didn’t even earn a nomination.)

Favorite Family Movie: "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory"
Also nominated: "Chicken Little" & "Madagascar
"

(Another decent pick, although "Wallace & Gromit" would have been nominated if the average American didn’t think British films come with subtitles.)

Favorite Movie Drama: "Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith"
Also nominated: "Batman Begins" & "Coach Carter"

Favorite Movie: "Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith"
Also nominated: "Batman Begins" & "Hitch"

(OK, I’ll let ’em get away with the overall movie pick since "Sith" was huge at the box office and I really dug it a whole lot, but … BEST DRAMA??? The "American public" chose Star Wars freakin’ 3 as best drama??? Oh, people. You must stop. Why make the U.S. even more of a global laughing stock? "Brokeback Mountain" is a drama. "Good Night, and Good Luck." is a drama! "Munich," "A History of Violence," "Crash," "Walk the Line," and alllll of THESE MOVIES are dramas. Sorry, but I figure a working knowledge of genre classifications is a minimum requirement if you’re going to vote on any sort of movie poll … even one this painfully silly. Next year they’ll give "BloodRayne" best musical.)

My apologies to the folks on the People’s Choice payroll for my derisive mockery, but c’mon, you guys made it way too easy. And I challenge anyone to explain to me how "Star Wars 3" qualifies as a drama.

Tag Cloud

IFC Films finale Teen 2018 RT History DirecTV Disney Plus joker Reality E3 book Character Guide what to watch 24 frames CBS Lifetime Christmas movies Nickelodeon Marvel Studios Winners Star Wars Sci-Fi hist 2015 ghosts Toys 45 Thanksgiving Stephen King period drama Cannes Academy Awards aliens crossover binge Sundance TV SDCC Calendar TV renewals werewolf Family Disney Spectrum Originals Tubi cartoon Song of Ice and Fire Starz Photos latino romance NBC Classic Film 21st Century Fox Rocky Britbox Netflix Christmas movies Comedy 71st Emmy Awards Pride Month teaser 2016 dc Grammys BET Hallmark Logo Pop spinoff boxoffice Fox News quibi anthology slashers nature rotten movies we love theme song kids Binge Guide Superheroes Mindy Kaling game of thrones MCU BBC space Extras LGBTQ The Arrangement Reality Competition TCA 2017 Netflix streaming Universal TNT transformers renewed TV shows OneApp zero dark thirty Election spanish language Interview YouTube The Walking Dead Cartoon Network Disney+ Disney Plus Walt Disney Pictures Emmy Nominations 2019 Elton John docudrama children's TV TCA Vudu sequel Chilling Adventures of Sabrina south america award winner Freeform Hulu Spring TV green book Biopics Mary Poppins Returns MTV ABC Baby Yoda supernatural zombie TLC OWN mockumentary strong female leads Columbia Pictures CW Seed AMC Paramount Network unscripted HBO Max SundanceTV Premiere Dates TV composers spain TCM Star Trek National Geographic SXSW comics Sundance Now screen actors guild Emmys Superheroe Animation Arrowverse Sneak Peek X-Men Adult Swim Warner Bros. Valentine's Day Rock cults RT21 hispanic Tomatazos facebook Watching Series justice league Schedule Countdown TCA Winter 2020 blaxploitation Comic Book movies History Podcast Shondaland Apple YouTube Red versus Tarantino anime Lionsgate biography doctor who Action Masterpiece Ellie Kemper cars travel series casting cops witnail Amazon Prime directors Christmas screenings natural history 2017 canceled Year in Review GIFs festivals game show harry potter Bravo Fall TV Set visit Marvel Television Certified Fresh true crime Hallmark Christmas movies Comedy Central TBS vampires Marvel A24 Summer social media New York Comic Con canceled TV shows Turner TIFF Nominations stand-up comedy indie name the review FX Turner Classic Movies VICE FOX Holidays breaking bad cancelled television science fiction Disney streaming service ABC Family Captain marvel Trivia Amazon singing competition dramedy 2020 Sony Pictures Heroines A&E crime drama Comics on TV Black Mirror Sundance Music cancelled TV series YouTube Premium Best and Worst The Purge richard e. Grant based on movie Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt ESPN war Crackle President Red Carpet LGBT First Reviews Drama Fantasy Quiz GoT The Witch cooking thriller YA MSNBC Chernobyl Ghostbusters Esquire Lucasfilm Mary poppins historical drama Awards IFC Peacock video free movies adventure Endgame WarnerMedia batman First Look elevated horror Spike Mystery PBS Apple TV+ Brie Larson Kids & Family BBC America Women's History Month Marathons Creative Arts Emmys cancelled TV shows Video Games discovery Musical Ovation Trailer television Holiday politics Shudder DC Comics medical drama sports Amazon Prime Video CNN TV Land Rocketman Martial Arts Mary Tyler Moore HBO Musicals ITV sitcom adaptation sag awards DGA robots crime mutant christmas movies diversity Infographic Anna Paquin Food Network USA Network 20th Century Fox Opinion Mudbound CMT Writers Guild of America Lifetime PaleyFest psychological thriller Television Academy Tumblr golden globes NYCC reboot foreign spy thriller Nat Geo Western WGN dragons DC Universe Trophy Talk halloween police drama El Rey Box Office psycho GLAAD Disney Channel Pixar Super Bowl jamie lee curtis APB See It Skip It dceu revenge toy story Epix comiccon Dark Horse Comics FXX spider-man Winter TV USA Cosplay Film Festival Film Polls and Games Acorn TV DC streaming service disaster TruTV crime thriller Apple TV Plus Discovery Channel Rom-Com independent talk show E! serial killer Pirates 007 romantic comedy Pet Sematary miniseries Paramount Crunchyroll VH1 zombies technology San Diego Comic-Con The CW cats Avengers cancelled tv talk ratings American Society of Cinematographers animated Oscars comic blockbuster political drama CBS All Access Country Awards Tour Syfy Horror cinemax Showtime