The "People's Choice" is Pure Idiocy

by | January 11, 2006 | Comments

Whenever I share a new Top Ten List or Critic’s Group Nomination list, I’m always extra careful to be fair and respectful of other peoples’ opinions. But after seeing what the "People’s Choice Awards" handed out for 2005’s movies, I just can’t contain myself. It’s simply too hilarious.

According to CNN, "the nominations were determined by editors at Entertainment Weekly, the People’s Choice production team and a panel of pop culture fans. Winners were determined by Internet voting."

So here are the peoples’ choices:

Favorite Female Movie Star: Sandra Bullock
Also nominated: Angelina Jolie & Nicole Kidman

(Ms. Bullock appeared in two films in 2005: the ensemble drama "Crash" and the stunningly awful "Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous.")

Favorite Male Movie Star: Johnny Depp
Also nominated: Nicolas Cage & Samuel L. Jackson

(OK, no real complaint here, even if applauding the awesomeness of Johnny Depp has grown a little old-hat by now. JD did have a great ’05 tho, starring in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," "Corpse Bride," and "The Libertine.")

Favorite Leading Lady: Reese Witherspoon
Also nominated: Cameron Diaz & Renee Zellweger

(So does this mean Reese isn’t a "movie star"?)

Favorite Leading Man: Brad Pitt
Also nominated: Jamie Foxx & Adam Sandler

(Just for "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" alone? OK, peoples. Better than the alternatives, anyway.)

Favorite Female Action Star: Jennifer Garner
Also nominated: Angelina Jolie & Catherine Zeta-Jones

(Well this just makes no freakin’ sense at all. The only action movie Ms. Garner appeared in last year was "Elektra," which nobody went to see because it sucked. And yet enough people saw it to make it their "choice.")

Favorite Male Action Star: Matthew McConaughey
Also nominated: Brad Pitt & The Rock

(For "Sahara"? Did nobody SEE the lead actor in "Batman Begins"?)

Favorite On-Screen Matchup: Vince Vaughn & Owen Wilson in "Wedding Crashers"
Also nominated: Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt in "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" and Chris Rock & Adam Sandler in "The Longest Yard"

(I’m really glad they said "On-Screen," otherwise I’d assume Vince and Owen are lovers.)

Favorite Movie Comedy: "Wedding Crashers"
Also nominated: "Hitch" & "The Longest Yard"

(Raise your hand if you honestly think "Wedding Crashers" is funnier than "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," which somehow didn’t even earn a nomination.)

Favorite Family Movie: "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory"
Also nominated: "Chicken Little" & "Madagascar
"

(Another decent pick, although "Wallace & Gromit" would have been nominated if the average American didn’t think British films come with subtitles.)

Favorite Movie Drama: "Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith"
Also nominated: "Batman Begins" & "Coach Carter"

Favorite Movie: "Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith"
Also nominated: "Batman Begins" & "Hitch"

(OK, I’ll let ’em get away with the overall movie pick since "Sith" was huge at the box office and I really dug it a whole lot, but … BEST DRAMA??? The "American public" chose Star Wars freakin’ 3 as best drama??? Oh, people. You must stop. Why make the U.S. even more of a global laughing stock? "Brokeback Mountain" is a drama. "Good Night, and Good Luck." is a drama! "Munich," "A History of Violence," "Crash," "Walk the Line," and alllll of THESE MOVIES are dramas. Sorry, but I figure a working knowledge of genre classifications is a minimum requirement if you’re going to vote on any sort of movie poll … even one this painfully silly. Next year they’ll give "BloodRayne" best musical.)

My apologies to the folks on the People’s Choice payroll for my derisive mockery, but c’mon, you guys made it way too easy. And I challenge anyone to explain to me how "Star Wars 3" qualifies as a drama.

Tag Cloud

Film OWN Year in Review HBO Max Photos Best and Worst Avengers Mindy Kaling Song of Ice and Fire green book The Walking Dead festival Netflix Christmas movies directors Christmas TCA Winter 2020 cinemax Hallmark Christmas movies Reality Competition singing competition Funimation YA book halloween tv Turner serial killer Epix revenge SDCC asian-american Calendar Thanksgiving PBS Acorn TV Starz cancelled TV shows TCA Awards Lucasfilm TLC Rocketman Adult Swim Martial Arts war Star Trek canceled french Apple TV+ CNN Amazon Grammys Turner Classic Movies Watching Series Netflix SXSW sequel Captain marvel cartoon PaleyFest The Arrangement biography Comedy Central teaser Television Academy die hard Red Carpet WarnerMedia crossover Video Games LGBT nbcuniversal VOD theme song TV Land BET cars Ellie Kemper Shondaland dark video on demand documentary werewolf streaming dogs Apple TV Plus classics FOX cancelled TV series Election scorecard facebook chucky spy thriller NYCC disaster TNT Action Travel Channel tv talk Anna Paquin CW Seed remakes DC Comics GLAAD Countdown See It Skip It Comic Book toronto Biopics Arrowverse Women's History Month cats Paramount Network fast and furious indiana jones Tarantino movies animated Interview strong female leads justice league independent Emmy Nominations kids The Witch Set visit anime Nat Geo BBC Tumblr anthology Family Dark Horse Comics Apple rotten movies we love Fantasy based on movie President italian Rocky Nickelodeon Spectrum Originals Esquire true crime BBC One children's TV Lionsgate Schedule hist Hulu japanese Trailer stoner HBO Go comedies TruTV reboot what to watch supernatural Food Network Universal venice elevated horror golden globes nfl BBC America Country YouTube Red cancelled Reality science fiction BAFTA political drama films The Purge Rock cults Tubi Polls and Games Holidays travel adaptation A&E all-time TCM Rom-Com concert Marathons BET Awards vampires video jamie lee curtis Brie Larson critics Superheroes First Reviews hollywood E3 cooking breaking bad ratings Pet Sematary archives romance psychological thriller YouTube Premium MSNBC Crunchyroll best Mary Poppins Returns Opinion historical drama Valentine's Day sequels RT21 television ESPN Toys VICE mutant crime thriller Marvel Television adventure El Rey LGBTQ transformers Kids & Family Shudder dc Mudbound 71st Emmy Awards Winners Amazon Prime Star Wars social media series robots National Geographic 2018 20th Century Fox Pop TV Super Bowl 4/20 2020 Amazon Studios USA Network Podcast DGA obituary Tomatazos Musicals 2017 ABC Family laika 2015 Warner Bros. Extras ABC harry potter Baby Yoda Logo Writers Guild of America Pop Binge Guide Elton John aliens Mary poppins Hear Us Out dragons nature CMT spanish language renewed TV shows Horror DC Universe canceled TV shows satire dceu PlayStation Television Critics Association Oscars criterion Marvel Studios Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt australia San Diego Comic-Con Heroines casting halloween RT History rotten Sundance TV Stephen King Lifetime Christmas movies Bravo spain latino universal monsters south america versus child's play name the review miniseries A24 Masterpiece New York Comic Con Box Office hispanic crime drama franchise Awards Tour scary movies joker doctor who free movies spanish Fall TV Sony Pictures Discovery Channel VH1 finale christmas movies docudrama Peacock Quiz sag awards Fox News AMC indie Crackle police drama Black Mirror Disney streaming service reviews Cannes space politics a nightmare on elm street Holiday mockumentary Awards psycho zero dark thirty Emmys Ovation blockbuster Certified Fresh medical drama award winner period drama Comedy TV renewals Spring TV First Look 72 Emmy Awards ITV Freeform American Society of Cinematographers Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Pride Month Black History Month stand-up comedy cancelled television diversity comiccon Classic Film movie MCU toy story Premiere Dates football Ghostbusters SundanceTV richard e. Grant Animation Disney Plus stop motion Paramount TCA 2017 worst documentaries crime Academy Awards foreign natural history Showtime Character Guide game of thrones comics superhero 2016 Teen Sundance Now Pirates Lifetime Comics on TV USA technology Fox Searchlight Mystery Marvel talk show Western MTV DC streaming service discovery Disney Channel Disney+ Disney Plus worst movies zombies batman GoT Syfy Hallmark Mary Tyler Moore YouTube 21st Century Fox Creative Arts Emmys Superheroe CBS All Access Sneak Peek Infographic X-Men news sitcom E! Summer mission: impossible game show festivals unscripted IFC Films 007 spider-man composers comic quibi thriller Disney boxoffice FXX 24 frames FX on Hulu Endgame Trivia spinoff Winter TV emmy awards Cosplay Film Festival Columbia Pictures romantic comedy sports TV parents Vudu TIFF Trophy Talk NBC Walt Disney Pictures Amazon Prime Video Sundance witnail Nominations HBO Spike FX 45 The CW screenings History Musical slashers The Academy 2019 OneApp WGN GIFs ghosts zombie Sci-Fi Chernobyl binge cops Britbox Pixar dramedy IFC APB twilight TBS CBS Music DirecTV Drama Cartoon Network screen actors guild TCA blaxploitation