This week in TV news, Peter Capaldi warns Doctor Who fans about a very sad-but-clever departure, while Sean Bean theorizes about the fate of Game of Thrones‘ Jon Snow. Plus, Vice launches a 24-hour cable network, USA green-lights a new show with Dana Carvey, and The Muppets reboot with a new showrunner!


PETER CAPALDI SAYS CLARA’S DEPARTURE FROM DOCTOR WHO WILL BE CLEVER, BUT SAD

Get your hankies ready. Doctor Who’s Peter Capaldi says that the exit of his co-star Jenna Coleman has left him weepy. Coleman, who plays Clara in the current BBC America series, announced in September that she would be leaving the show to take the role as Queen Elizabeth in an upcoming ITV drama. Ending her character on the show has been done in a sad-but-clever manner according to Capaldi, who spoke on the UK’s Radio 1 Breakfast Show Wednesday morning. “It’s not quite what you think is gonna happen,” Capaldi told host Nick Grimshaw. “You think what’s gonna happen is gonna happen and then something else happens… It’s always clever the way these things are done on Doctor Who, so get lots of hankies ready. It’s sad over a number of weeks.” [Update: This post has been edited to remove possible spoilers] Additionally, showrunner Stephen Moffat said in an interview with Movie Player, “Clara is gone and will never return… I can only say that what will happen will shock, surprise and terrify. Strictly in that order.”


SHOWRUNNER EXITS THE MUPPETS

The Muppets, which came into the fall as one of the season’s most anticipated shows, has had a rocky go of it so far. First, the ratings, while better than last year’s Tuesday night show Selfie, are not as stellar as ABC had hoped. Then, critics were not so enthusiastic about the pilot, giving it a low Fresh score of 64 percent on the Rotten Tomatoes’ Tomatometer. Now, just days after news that ABC has ordered three more episodes of The Muppets, it surfaces that showrunner Bob Kushell is leaving. According to insiders, there was a creative clash between Kushell and the reboot’s executive producer Bill Prady, who got his showbiz start working for Jim Henson. Galavant showrunner Kristin Newman is expected to take over for the season’s back half, which will air after the winter hiatus and serve as a creative reboot for the show.


SEAN BEAN WEIGHS IN ON HIS BASTARD’S FATE

[WARNING: Season five Game of Thrones spoilers ahead!] Sean Bean who played Ned Stark on the first season of Game of Thrones shared his theory about the fate of his character’s bastard son, Jon Snow (Kit Harington). Bean, whose own character met an untimely and jaw-dropping demise in season one, spoke to the final episode of season five, “Mother’s Mercy,” which ended with Jon Snow taking multiple knives, Julius Caesar-style, to the chest and lying face-up and staring dead-eyed into the sky. During a press conference for The Frankenstein Chronicles, Bean addressed whether or not Jon survived the attack, saying, “It kind of didn’t look like it, I have to admit, but who knows? Anything could happen. I guess that’s the big question… It used to be: ‘Who’s Jon Snow’s dad?’ Now it’s: ‘Is Jon Snow really dead?’ But I think he probably is. What do I know?” Season six of Game of Thrones is expected to return to HBO the first week of May.


VICE IS LAUNCHING A TV CHANNEL

Vice Media announced this week the launch of its new 24-hour cable network, VICELAND. “We’ve been shooting and cutting for months, and we can’t wait to share with you our vision of what television should look like,” VICE posted on its website Wednesday. “The new shows are awesome. When we started making them, collaborating with our friends in the extended VICE family, we really didn’t know how they would come together to create a TV channel. But when we saw what we had, we knew we were on to something really special.” Part of the aforementioned “VICE family” includes Spike Jonze, who has been working with the media company on the new channel. “We wanted VICELAND to be different, to feel like everything on there has a reason to exist and a strong point of view,” Jonze said. VICE released a nine-minute trailer to tease its upcoming programming offerings, including series hosted by Ellen Page and Michael K. Williams. 


USA NETWORK GREENLIGHTS DANA CARVEY’S FIRST IMPRESSIONS

USA Network announced Thursday that it has green-lit the new series First Impressions, an unscripted half-hour comedy that pits amateur impressionists against each other in a weekly battle of celebrity send-ups. Saturday Night Live alum Dana Carvey, whose presidential impressions are for the ages, will be the “expert-in-residence,” mentoring contestants and participating in game play himself. “There are so many great impressionists and First Impressions gives them an opportunity to showcase their talents,” Carvey said in a statement. “Besides, I’ve always enjoyed watching an impressionist nail somebody….as in capture their voice.  Now I get paid to watch.” 

This week in TV news, AMC greenlights a motorcycle-themed reality show with Norman Reedus, while Netflix gives a full-series order to YA project 13 Reasons Why with Selena Gomez. Plus, check out the happiest, fluffiest TV binge happening this weekend, and be on the lookout for HBO original series coming this winter — and figure out what that means for the next season of Game of Thrones! When is winter coming already?!


AMC GREENLIGHTS RIDE WITH NORMAN REEDUS

AMC announced Thursday its plans for a new non-scripted series, Ride With Norman Reedus, which stars The Walking Dead fan favorite (Daryl!) on the open road. In Ride, the actor and biker enthusiast will “explore local motorcycle culture and history and celebrate some of the best and brightest collectors, mechanics, and motorcycle craftsmen around the country.” Each episode will start in a different city and feature Reedus with a new riding companion — such as a fellow actor, musician, or bike fanatic — as they explore America’s motorcycle shops and collectors’ warehouses, as well as a few detours along the way (think tattoo parlors and roadside smokehouses). Ride With Norman Reedus, which will hit AMC in 2016 with six one-hour episodes, plans to showcase different motorcycles each week, adding to AMC’s existing unscripted programming: Comic Book Men and Talking Dead.


HBO SETS DATES FOR GIRLS, TOGETHERNESS, AND VINYL

HBO set dates for three of its original series this week: Vinyl, Girls, and Togetherness. First up, Martin Scorsese‘s rock drama, Vinyl, starring Bobby Cannavale and written by Terence Winter of Boardwalk Empire fame, will premiere with a special two-hour episode on Valentine’s Day at 9 p.m. The following Sunday, Feb. 21, Vinyl will be the opening act for the season-five premiere of Girls, starring Lena Dunham, Allison Williams, and Adam Driver, and the season-two premiere of Togetherness with Mark Duplass and Amanda Peet. Over at Vulture, writer E. Alex Jung has calculated that these February dates mean a later start than usual for the next season of Game of Thrones. “As HBO only programs two hours of shows on Sunday nights,” Jung wrote, “it means that the sixth season of Game of Thrones likely wouldn’t return until May 1 at the earliest.”


NETFLIX GIVES SELENA GOMEZ A STRAIGHT-TO-SERIES ORDER

Credit: Jamie McCarthy / Getty Images

Pop idol Selena Gomez will executive-produce a 13-episode adaptation of the young adult novel 13 Reasons Why for Netflix, according to Variety. In the 2007 book of the same name from Jay Asher, a boy named Clay receives a shoebox from his late crush, Hannah Baker, after she commits suicide. The contents of the box are cassettes that Clay is to distribute to 12 of his classmates — each of whom Hannah blames for taking her own life. Gomez reportedly took the project to Anonymous Content after reading the book, along with her mother Mandy Teefey, who will also executive-produce the project. Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Brian Yorkey, who penned the pilot, is attached to write the full series.


TWITCH TV IS AIRING 403 EPISODES OF BOB ROSS RIGHT NOW

In honor of what would have been prolific painter and TV personality Bob Ross’ 73rd birthday on Oct. 29, the online TV platform Twitch began streaming all 403 episodes of The Joy of Painting at 5 p.m. EST Thursday. The Joy of Painting aired for 11 years on PBS, during which time the soft-spoken artist would paint an entire painting in 30 minutes. Ever the optimist, Ross believed that “anyone can paint,” and would refer to his mistakes made while painting as “happy accidents.” Watching all 403 episodes would consist of a 200-hour long binge, but you’d probably come out the other end feeling as light and peaceful as a fluffy cloud.

This week in TV news, reboots are all the rage as Laverne Cox announces her Rocky Horror Picture Show role, Netflix teases a Gilmore Girls revival, and NBC flirts with Cruel Intentions. Plus, all children of the ’90s will be excited to know that Simpsons World now has audio commentary!


LAVERNE COX TO STAR IN ICONIC ROCKY HORROR ROLE

Last month marked the 40th anniversary of the cult film The Rocky Horror Picture Show, featuring Tim Curry in the famous role of Dr. Frank-N-Furter (which he also played on Broadway in the 1970s). Now some exciting casting news is bubbling up this week about the long-gestating revival at Fox — namely that Orange Is the New Black star Laverne Cox (Sofia) is taking on the Frank-N-Furter role. Cox shared the story on social media Thursday, saying “I am so excited that the news is out. I am so honored to be a part of the Rocky Horror legacy. #DontDreamItBeIt #TransIsBeautiful.” In Rocky Horror, sweethearts Janet Weiss and Brad Majors happen upon the mansion of mad scientist Dr. Frank-N-Furter, who is in the midst of creating a new life-form — a muscular man named Rocky. The revival is expected to hit Fox in the form of a two-hour TV movie in fall 2016.


SIMPSONS WORLD LAUNCHES AUDIO COMMENTARY

Great news for the most obsessive Simpsons fans! Simpsons World, the online destination where every Simpsons ever lives, now offers an audio commentary track option for episodes in its library. For the launch, the audio track is available for the first 10 episodes of season 18, with new tracks dropping every week. For the season 18 premiere, “The Mook, The Chef, The Wife, and Her Homer,” head writer Al Jean chats with other Simpsons scribes, directors, and guest star Joe Mantegna, who plays Fat Tony, giving behind-the-scenes intell about the origins of many of the jokes (the first being the allusion to The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover) and an obscene word that almost made it to air on one of Otto’s Grand Funk Railroad cassette tapes. Visit SimpsonsWorld.com for more Simpsons extras.


NETFLIX IS REVIVING GILMORE GIRLS

TV Line reported this week that the beloved dramedy Gilmore Girls will be returning, thanks to a deal with Netflix and Warner Bros. Television, after being off the air for over eight years. The revival will consist of four 90-minute episodes/mini-movies — all of which will be written by series creator Amy Sherman-Palladino and exec producer Daniel Palladino (the two were notoriously booted from the show before its seventh and final season).  While negotiations are still in progress, major cast members Lauren Graham (Lorelai), Alexis Bledel (Rory), Kelly Bishop (Emily), and Scott Patterson (Luke) are all expected to return. Sadly, star Edward Herrman passed away last year. It’s unclear if other series regulars Jared Padalecki (Supernatural), Milo Ventimiglia (Gotham), Matt Czuchry (The Good Wife), Liza Weil (How To Get Away With Murder), or Melissa McCarthy (Mike & Molly) will be returning as well.


A CRUEL INTENTIONS REBOOT IS IN THE WORKS AT NBC

Many a ’90s kid snuck a viewing of hard R-rated Cruel Intentions — the 1999 teen version of Dangerous Liaisons starring Reese Witherspoon, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ryan Phillippe, and Selma Blair. Now NBC is planning a TV revival with a “modern spin.” The new Cruel Intentions will be centered around the 16-year-old son of Sebastian Valmont (Phillippe’s character in the film) and Annette Hargrove (Witherspoon’s character in the film) as he finds his father’s journal and learns of his family’s dark legacy. The film’s original writer/director Roger Kumble is set to direct the pilot.
simp_2604-Every_Mans_Dream_TABF14-Sc4033_hires2

(Photo by Season 27 premiere (Fox Broadcasting Company))

 

Springfield’s favorite yellow family returns to Fox this Sunday for their 27th season, making this the perfect opportunity to look back upon 26 years of The Simpsons and rank all the season premieres. As it turns out, I have never missed an episode of The Simpsons, so this is basically the article I’ve been waiting to write my entire life.

To clarify things a little, we are looking at the first regular episode of each season. For several years, The Simpsons kicked off with a “Treehouse of Horror” episode, but we’re not counting those here. (“Treehouse of Horror” specials deserve their own list, so it’s a good thing we did that last year!)

Some of the later seasons have even made it into the top ten because I think that The Simpsons has always found new ways to stay relevant and top itself. So, before the 27th season of The Simpsons begins with its controversial opener, “Every Man’s Dream,” let’s look back at how the last 26 season premieres stack up, counting down to the best premiere!


(Photo by "Bart the Genius" (Fox Broadcasting Company))

 

#26. “Bart the Genius,” Season One
Original air date: January 4, 1990

What Happens: Bart swaps aptitude tests with Martin Prince and is sent to a school for the gifted. Alas, that’s one place Bart can’t fake it, so he doesn’t fit in at all.

How It Stacks Up:  Give ‘em a break, they were just getting started. It took until season three to really find the satirical groove in Simpsons stories. The Simpsons is best when it works on multiple levels, but in the early days it was just one level. And this was when it was still shocking to hear a cartoon say “damn.”


#25. “The Parent Rap,” Season 13

Original air date: November 11, 2001

What Happens: When Bart steals a police car, a new judge (Jane Kaczmarek) holds his parents accountable too. Her creative punishment is to tether Homer and Bart together to force Homer to discipline his kid.

How It Stacks Up: The idea of literally tying Homer and Bart together seems funny, but it really only pays off in animated slapstick. “The Parent Rap” doesn’t have the intelligent bite that the best Simpsons episodes have, and — as much as we want someone to discipline Bart — but the laughs don’t always justify the punishment.


#24. “Bart Gets an F,” Season Two
Original air date: October 11, 1990

What Happens: After failing so many tests, Bart faces repeating the fourth grade. So in order to avoid an extra year of school, he actually tries to pass a test.

How It Stacks Up: This is getting there. This episode is actually about something. Bart really tries, but he still fails. The humor is simple, with the biggest laugh coming when Bart kisses Mrs. Krabappel and proceeds to spit it out.


#23. “The Falcon and the D’Ohman,” Season 23
Original air date: September 25, 2011

What Happens: Homer tries to make friends with Wayne (Kiefer Sutherland), the new guard at the power plant, but it turns out that Wayne is actually repressing his past as a covert agent.

How It Stacks Up: Despite an homage to A History of Violence and Sutherland guest-voicing, the jokes don’t seem to land in this episode. Random references to horror slasher killers, superheroes, and The Terminator don’t always have a point. There’s an uncharacteristically long setup to a dumb joke about sticking mashed potatoes in your ears.


#22. “The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer,” Season 18
Original air date: September 10, 2006

What Happens: The Simpsons meet Fat Tony’s son, Michael, who really wants to become a chef. Bart and Lisa help Michael tell his dad that he’d rather make food than kill people.

How It Stacks Up: There are some solid spoofs of The Sopranos and The Godfather, but too much of the episode relies on mob jokes and Italian stereotypes. It’s still worth seeing for the “truck truck truck” though.


#21: “All’s Fair in Oven War,” Season 16
Original air date: November 14, 2004

What Happens: A new kitchen inspires Marge to develop recipes and enter a cooking contest that she’ll do anything to win. Meanwhile, Bart finds Homer’s old naughty magazines and opens a Playboy Club for his friends.

How It Stacks Up: A perfectly harmless but unmemorable episode, it has a moral (don’t cheat) and a strange fantasy sequence of Homer murdering a food mascot. James Caan cameos as himself because he never misses a Playboy party, even if Bart doesn’t know what a playboy is yet.


#20. “He Loves To Fly and He D’ohs,” Season 19
Original air date: September 23, 2007

What Happens: Flying on a private jet motivates Homer to aim higher, but failure to land a cushy job makes him feel even guiltier about disappointing his family.

How It Stacks Up: As the first season after The Simpsons Movie, this represents a period where The Simpsons was reinvigorated with new creativity. We’re treated to an opening credits featuring wreckage of the dome and Spider-Pig. Stephen Colbert is kind of wasted as Homer’s life coach, but Lionel Richie gets the real laughs replacing his lyrics with the word “beer” for Homer.


#19. “A Tale of Two Springfields,” Season 12
Original air date: November 5, 2000

What Happens: When Springfield creates two separate area codes, rivalry leads the new area code to secede. Homer becomes mayor of New Springfield and lures The Who to perform there instead.

How It Stacks Up: Taking a simple premise and escalating it to absurd extremes is classic Simpsons. The Who cameo fits into a long line of rock stars being self-deprecating in animated form (see “How I Spent My Strummer Vacation.”)


#18. “Lard of the Dance,” Season 10
Original air date: August 23, 1998

What Happens: A new student (Lisa Kudrow) pressures Lisa to dress more adult and use her cool lingo. Meanwhile, Homer and Bart start a grease bootlegging business.

How It Stacks Up: Would you believe both stories come together in a school dance overflowing with stolen grease? Lisa’s story is still relevant today as we’re asking kids to grow up too fast, and Homer and Bart’s story is plain ridiculous as they face off against a naked Groundskeeper Willie.

(Photo by "Bonfire of the Manatees" (Fox Broadcasting Company))

 

#17. “Bonfire of the Manatees,” Season 17
Original air date: September 11, 2005

What Happens: Homer owes the mob money so he lends them his house to shoot adult movies. Marge storms out in anger and becomes obsessed with saving the manatees.

How It Stacks Up: The way a ridiculous scheme of Homer’s leads Marge into a real story is The Simpsons storytelling at its best. Alec Baldwin plays the manatee activist and it’s adorable how Marge angrily calls the porno a “snuggle film.”


#16. “Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes,” Season 20
Original air date: September 28, 2008

What Happens: Homer becomes a bounty hunter with Flanders as his partner. But when Homer becomes the bounty, will Flanders turn him in?

How It Stacks Up: This episode has everything. There are fun moments with supporting characters such as Snake and his baby-mama. There’s cartoon action in Homer and Flanders’ bounty chases. Flanders’ Christian rock cover of AC/DC’s “Dirty Deeds.” Wolf the Bounty Hunter. And of all the crazy jobs Homer has done, bounty hunter is relatively normal.


#15. “Clown in the Dumps,” Season 26
Original air date: September 28, 2014

What Happens: It was supposed to be a surprise who died in the season premiere, but given the title, it was easy to figure out that Krusty’s father, Rabbi Krustofsky (Jackie Mason), didn’t survive to season 26. Even though his dad always disapproved of Krusty’s comedy, Krusty is finally able to get closure.

How It Stacks Up: This is what The Simpsons is all about: heart with bite. Krusty finds out a friend has been telling his dad Krusty’s jokes and making him laugh. But when Krusty realizes that his dad did love his jokes all along, Bart points out, “I guess he just hated your delivery.”


#14. “Elementary School Musical,” Season 22
Original air date: September 26, 2010

What Happens: Lisa goes to arts camp where she feels at home with the counselors (Jemaine Clement and Bret McKenzie) and other campers (Lea Michele, Cory Monteith and Amber Riley). Meanwhile, Krusty wins the Nobel Peace Prize, but ends up extradited for international crimes.

How It Stacks Up: New Flight of the Conchords music and Glee cast recordings are highlights, as is a military choir singing the “Itchy and Scratchy” theme song to Krusty in the subplot. This episode also reveals the truth about artists (they’re poor).


#13. “HOM?RLAND,” Season 25
Original air date: September 29, 2013

What Happens: In a Homeland spoof, Homer comes back from a convention in Boise a different person. Of course, it’s all back to normal by the end.

How It Stacks Up: This episode makes fun of Homer by undoing all of his sloppy trademarks. It also makes fun of paranoia cliches and features Agent Annie Crawford (Kristen Wiig), a parody of Claire Danes’ Homeland character. Marge’s Cheetos and pork spit-take and Homer’s meta prayer (praying for a climax payoff) are highlights.


#12. “My Mother the Carjacker,” Season 15
Original air date: November 9, 2003

What Happens: Homer discovers his long lost hippie mother (Glenn Close) is still out there, and tries to help her catch up on lost times. But when Mr. Burns wants revenge, she has to go on the run again.

How It Stacks Up: A lot of minor characters get great lines, like the waitress refusing to aid and abet without a tip. Remember Jay Leno’s “Headlines” bit? Homer tries his own headlines but doesn’t get it. This episode uses the plot to lay up random Simpsons jokes, like a super cliche ‘60s montage and Homer’s letters to movies (“Dear Die Hard…”).


#11. “Moonshine River,” Season 24
Original air date: September 30, 2012

What Happens: Bart goes to New York to find his old girlfriend (Zooey Deschanel). While there, Marge tries to see the New York sights on a budget.

How It Stacks Up: The Simpsons is great at undercutting every bit of sweetness with a joke. It’s impressive that they managed to get all of Bart’s other exes (Anne Hathaway, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and Natalie Portman) to come back, and they’ve also got all new New York jokes to compete with their other NYC-based season premiere below!

(Photo by "Homer the Whopper" (Fox Broadcasting Company))

 

#10 “Homer the Whopper,” Season 21
Original air date: September 27, 2009

What Happens: Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg wrote this episode in which Hollywood turns Comic Book Guy’s character, Everyman, into a movie, casting Homer as the lead. Rogen plays a personal trainer trying to get Homer into shape.

How It Stacks Up: Considering there is a classic episode about making the Radioactive Man movie, it’s miraculous how Rogen and Goldberg found a whole new story to tell about a comic book movie. Of course, in the years since Radioactive Man, there’s a whole new slew of comic book movies to make fun of. Also, Comic Book Guy meeting studio executives!


#9. How I Spent My Strummer Vacation,” Season 14
Original air date: November 10, 2002

What Happens: Homer goes to a rock n’ roll camp run by Mick Jagger and Keith Richards featuring instructors Lenny Kravitz, Tom Petty, Elvis Costello, and Brian Setzer. When it’s over, Homer thinks he’s going onstage with them, but they make him their roadie.

How It Stacks Up: The best part of this episode is actually the beginning, where an episode of “Taxicab Conversations” reveals that Disco Stu doesn’t even like disco. You have to love when background characters get to go deep. Plus, the guest cast is hilariously self-deprecating, with Jagger and Richards showing they’re real sticklers for paperwork.


#8.  “Homer’s Barbershop Quartet,” Season Five
Original air date: September 30, 1993

What Happens: Speaking of Homer’s random jobs, he used to be a singer! Bart and Lisa find a record of Homer’s old barbershop quartet and so Homer tells the story of the rise and fall of The Be Sharps.

How It Stacks Up: We’re getting into the all-time classic Simpsons episodes now. This is a standout episode for Simpsons music with the original song “Baby on Board,” plus some barbershop standards. The Be Sharps are a spoof of The Beatles with a “Bigger Than Jesus” and Yoko joke. (Note, this flashback takes place in 1985. Now a long-ago flashback is set in, like, 2005.)


#7. “Kamp Krusty,” Season Four
Original air date: September 24, 1992

What Happens: Bart and Lisa are excited to attend Kamp Krusty, but it turns out to be a dump with only unconvincing Krusty impersonators. Conditions get so bad that Bart ultimately leads a revolt.

How it Stacks Up: This is one of the most memorable classics about everything wrong with corporate licensing and the childhood expectations that everything they’re selling you will be great. Bart was born to lead a revolution, and Krusty’s reparations are appropriately sleazy.


#6. “The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson,” Season Nine
Original air date: September 21, 1997

What Happens: As a designated driver, Barney ends up driving the Simpsons car to New York City and leaves it there to collect parking tickets and a boot. Homer and the family go to New York to get it back and they explore the landmarks of the Big Apple.

How It Stacks Up: Normally, the Simpsons visit fake places that closely resemble real ones for the sake of comedy. Here they get to actually make fun of the real New York. Broadway musicals, highbrow magazine offices, street crime, the subway, and Woody Allen are just some of the New York traditions that get skewered, Simpsons-style.


#5.  “Beyond Blunderdome,” Season 11
Original air date: September 26, 1999

What Happens: Mel Gibson holds a test screening of his remake of Mr. Smith Goes to Washington in Springfield. He takes The Simpsons back to Hollywood with him to work on Homer’s rewrites.

How it Stacks Up: To put this episode in cultural context, this was when Mel Gibson was a beloved American icon and Anne Heche was Ellen Degeneres’ girlfriend. Seeing the Simpsons in Tinsel Town is great, as is the Homer-inspired new ending of Gibson’s movie — a vicious satirical stab at selling out for Hollywood.


#4. “Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part 2,” Season Seven
Original air date: September 17, 1995

What Happens: In the season six finale, Mr. Burns is shot for blocking out the sun in order to force Springfield residents to use more nuclear energy. The cliffhanger is finally resolved as a surprising shooter is revealed. Of course, Mr. Burns survives.

How It Stacks Up: This is literally the episode we waited for all summer. Well, every season premiere is that for the die-hards, but this one had fans betting on suspects from May to September. The mystery plot gives lots of the suspects funny ways to prove their innocence until the final culprit is revealed.


#3. “Bart of Darkness,” Season Six
Original air date: September 4, 1994

What Happens: After Bart breaks his leg at a pool party, he is confined to his room in a cast for the summer. Looking out the window, he thinks he sees Flanders murder his wife.

How It Stacks Up: A Simpsons spoof of Rear Window? Yes, please. But now that you know Flanders has not been incarcerated for murder the past 20 seasons, and his wife dies for real in season 11, it’s not such a spoiler to reveal that all turns out to be a hilarious misunderstanding.


#2. “Stark Raving Dad,” Season Three
Original air date: September 19, 1991

What Happens: Mixed laundry makes Homer’s shirt pink, and Mr. Burns has him committed because what kind of lunatic wears a pink shirt? In the institution, Homer meets Leon Kompowsky (Michael Jackson).

How It Stacks Up:  This is the one with Michael Jackson, only he called himself John Jay Smith.Yes, it was him. MJ wrote “Happy Birthday Lisa,” but didn’t sing it. They could get Jackson’s speaking voice and songwriting services, so it was Kipp Lennon who did the singing, and Lennon later performed the song at the Simpsons Hollywood Bowl concert in 2014.


#1. “You Only Move Twice,” Season Eight
Original air date: November 3, 1996

What Happens: Homer gets a great new job for Hank Scorpio, who turns out to be a Simpsons-ized James Bond villain. That would be fine with Homer, but Marge, Bart, and Lisa have a hard time adjusting to their new lives.

How It Stacks Up: This is one of the all-time greatest episodes of The Simpsons. Marge has nothing to do because the oven cleans itself and Bart gets a case of the “spose’das.” This episode actually ruined the real Goldfinger for me. Now every time I see it, I want Sean Connery to flip a coin into the laser like his animated alter-ego does in this episode.


Fred Topel has written over 20 reviews of The Simpsons for CraveOnline, including his column “Best Episode Ever.” Having seen every single episode of The Simpsons, he will defend the later seasons to the death — or at least until he sees a dog with a fluffy tail. Follow Fred on Twitter at @FredTopel.

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